February? Of What Year?

     I know I have mentioned this before, and I know I will many more times:

Where the HELL is the time going?

     Did you notice that it will be February in two days?  I am just getting over my New Year's Eve party.  It seems difficult to believe that my resolutions have been dead for almost 30 days already!

     At a time like this (when I wake up and think I missed a few weeks), I like to pause to appreciate the time I have.  Even if I am stuck in traffic at the time, it is humbling to remember that I am still here.  I am alive today, and I have a bright future ahead of me. The world is my oyster (too bad I never much cared for sea food).

     Everyday is a good day if you let it be.  Do not wait to wake up until 2013.  It will be here before you know it.

Award Shows

     So it is that time of year again.  All of last year's movies are being brought before Academies and Foreign Presses to determine which of them are worthy of distinction at their annual award ceremonies.

     Most of those organizations do not give awards where they are due.  Mostly...any panel comprised of critical "objective" movie aficionados.

     How many of the past Oscar Best Pictures have you seen?  How about plan on seeing?  Heard of?

     Chances are if you have not HEARD of a movie, it was not "all that."  Very few phenomenal pictures go unseen by the public.  And rightly so.  Should these fabulous movies not be the ones that we enjoy watching over and over again?

     Let's take a closer look.  Morgan Freeman.  Great actor.  How many Oscars does he have?  ONE.  Johnny Depp.  Amazing actor.  How many Oscars does he have?  NONE.

     Maybe it is the Academy.  How many Golden Globes does Mr. Freeman have?  Two (respectable).  Mr. Depp?  One (out of ten nominations).

     Then the people get a say.  Mr. Freeman may have only won two People's Choice Awards, but Mr. Depp has one ELEVEN.

     Now that is a big difference, don't you think?  I will never forget the year the Oscars gave out over ten awards to the Lord of the Rings, just because it was the last in the trilogy.  There were several deserving movies that did not receive the recognition they should have because of that.

     I do not care what the presses say.  I am more willing to go and see a movie that was recommended by one of my friends, than I am one that received a Golden Globe.

Accolade

Accolade: noun

1) any award, honor, or congratulatory notice

2) a light touch on the shoulder with the flat side of a sword, done in the ceremony of acknowledging knighthood

3) the ceremony itself

     Also has a musical and architectural definition.  The full definition can be found in any dictionary, particularly dictionary.reference.com.

Although Johnny Depp’s acting has been met with numerous accolades, he has yet to win an Oscar.

How to survive in a Horror Movie:

     If you ever find yourself trapped in a horror movie, just follow these simple rules to get yourself alive through the credits.
 
While in a bathroom:
 
Never close behind you or open the shower curtain.  I’ll solve the mystery – there is a murderer behind it, or soon will be.  Keep it open to protect yourself. 
 
Do not keep any electronic devices in or near the bathroom, especially old-fashioned radios or faulty hair dryers.  The murderer will throw it into the tub with you and electrocute you.  You will die.
 
NEVER POOP AGAIN.  People die on the crapper.  Proven fact.  Not everybody poops.

While in a secluded cabin in the woods:
 
What the HELL are you doing there?!  The police may not be able to find you, but the psychopath sure will.  Get out while you still can!
 

When wandering around outside in the dark:
 
Be protected.  Carry a weapon and flashlight at all times.
 
Don’t make too much noise.
 
If you are with someone, DON’T split up.  One of you will die shortly anyway, no need to have a startling reunion with your boyfriend’s lifeless body ten minutes later.
 
If your dog runs off into the wood, let him go and plan on getting a fish next time around.  Spot didn’t stand a chance.  Do not go looking for him or call out for him.  This will only bring about unnecessary panic when you alert to the murder of your location.  You can search for Spot’s body tomorrow to give him a proper funeral.

While in the basement: (Another stupid place to be, but if you must…)

Preferably tell someone that you are going down there.  Bring a flashlight with new and working batteries and a fully loaded gun.  Turn the lights on, and if they have already been “taken out,” turn back IMMEDIATELY.

While in your house:
 
Stay in the house unless you know the killer is already inside with you.  (Don’t explore the yard or go for a joy ride.  Your breaks have probably been cut anyway.)
 
Don’t open any closets. 
 
Stay in open areas with the doors in sight at all times.
 
Don’t answer your phone.  The murder is in your house, so get your ass out.
 
Don’t go into the garage.  You won’t come out in one piece.
 
Don’t get anyone else involved unless you don’t mind finding their mangled body later.
 

     I wish you luck if you should ever find yourself in a situation such as this.  As terrifying as it may be, if you die by not following any of the above instructions, that is really your fault and no jury would convict the killer if he was ever caught.  Don’t be stupid.

Bailiwick

Bailiwick - noun

     A person's area of work, skill, knowledge, or authority.


The journalist limited their opinions within their bailiwick to prevent uneducated advice.

Is the Internet Messing with our Minds?

Everything is at our fingertips.  If we need to look up a word, we type it into our favorite search engine, and the definition is brought to us.  How many of us use (or know how to for that matter) a dictionary?

I used to be able to read a whole book, and now I do not have the attention span to sit and read unless I am REALLY intrigued.  Now I only have the “time” to skim a summary or Spark Notes I find online.  The hyperlinks in news articles online even tell me the important parts of the story.  Why would you need to read Shakespeare anymore when you can get the main idea of Romeo and Juliet in a paragraph (an English paragraph)?  Even now, if you think this post is too long, I bet you are skimming.  Admit it!

There is a lot of debate going on that the internet is the root of this shift in the way we think and process information.  The issue is separating the effects of the medium (the internet) from the content (what you use the internet for).

All I can say is, do not lose the skills so you can function without modern technology.  Being able to use a dictionary and find a book through the Dewey Decimal System are invaluable skills to possess and pass down to future generations.  That way when we lose electricity for an indefinite amount of time, your lives can continue.

Healthy New Year

Have you ever noticed how many commercials pimping gym membership deals and magical diet programs they have on early in the year?  It’s as if all throughout January the TV is trying to remind us how unhealthy our lives are, and take advantage of any holiday guilt.

Then February rolls around, and no one has stuck to their New Year’s Resolutions, and the advertisements lay off the healthy side.  Gyms and diet plans must have a dramatic increase in enrollment at the start of the year, just to dwindle down to their regulars who have never achieved the body of their dreams.

We could all use more exercise and smarter eating, but anything that has to be advertised is not worth the aggravation.

Have a Happy and Healthy 2012!

Random Tangent

Everyone wants your email address nowadays.  It used to be for valid reasons only to people you knew. 

“Oh, I’ll need to tell you where the meeting location will be.  Give me your email.” 

Then it changed to giving your address in EXCHANGE for something. 

“Oh, you can have that cupcake, but we need you email address.” 

Now it is simply to sell your soul to who knows what. 

“Oh, you want to enter to win that car no one actually wins?  We need your address so we can inundate you with emails even your spam filter can’t block.  Here, have GIF of a cupcake!”

I like to give my email address and phone numbers only to people who truly need them. 

If You Had Six Months to Live

     What would you do if you walked into the doctor’s office this afternoon, and he told you that you had six months to live?

     Whenever this happens, most people are devastated (and rightly so).  Then everyone they tell starts to treat them as if they are already gone.

     But why is this?

     Life is short.  If you don’t know that by now, you’ve got some waking up to do.  Nothing is certain, especially when our time to go will come.  If you are given a few months to live, you can prepare for death, and enjoy the time you have left.  It is the rest of the population who walks around as if they are invincible, that have a rude awakening coming.

     No one was guaranteed a tomorrow.  Make the most out of this moment.  If you are doing something you do not enjoy, DON’T DO IT!  I realize that this is much easier said than done with all of the responsibilities one has nowadays, but try your best to enjoy what you do.  If you absolutely hate what you do for a living, maybe you should think about finding a new career.  It is never too late to change your mind about what you want to be when you grow up.

     Even taking a course in college that is “ruining your life” is not worth it.  If you crossed the street tomorrow and were hit by a flying ice cream truck, what would your last day have been like?  Were you doing something you truly loved with the people in your life that matter most?  Or were you torturing yourself with something that will probably never have been of use to you anyway?

     Seize the day, and make the most out of your situation.  You get one life to live, so don’t waste it.

Flash of Memories at One Sight

So I saw a book I have not seen in many years recently. When I saw it, I was instantly inundated by memories that I did not even realize could be triggered so easily.



It was the same type of Biology book I had in eleventh grade. That was the year I had to be home schooled on account I was undergoing cancer treatment. I dropped from the highest level of biology to the level below it, which my science teacher from the previous year so graciously offered to be my tutor. 



Dropping out of the classes I had to forever changed the remainder of my schooling career.  I have resentment for not being able to complete the path I had chosen, and yet what happened was for the best.  It is difficult to think about what might have been, and weigh that against what I have now.  I suppose that is why we do not control our destiny to some degree.



The feelings that accompany those moments (which are more extensive than I care to give detail), are indescribable. And they all rushed back to me as a wave of emotions that crashed over me as a stared at this book.